Banana Republic of Spring Lake Park

The Spring Lake Park Life editorial page seems to be more incoherent every week.

During this Memorial Week, communities with individual services honor their veterans and those who gave their lives so that Americans might live in this sweet land of liberty.

Speakers dwelled on an America conceived in liberty and its rights as declared in the U. S. Constitution guaranteeing life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

They pronounced that the First Amendment of the Bill of Rights establishes Freedom of Religion, Freedom of the Press, Freedom of Speech, Freedom to peaceably assemble and Freedom to redress grievances.

The fourth amendment protects individual privacy.

Today this nation needs to exercise those rights to preserve them.

There is a crisis in leadership and the country is fearful that some day terrorists might attack again. President Franklin Roosevelt rallied a nation when he said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Wow. Going from a description about honoring the sacrifice our veteran's have made to talking about a "crisis in leadership" in 4 short paragraphs. Perhaps Mr. Heinzman is building his portfolio for consideration as a New York Times editor.

Heinzman writes that "The fourth amendment protects individual privacy." And just what the hell did have to do with anything he wrote before? Nothing. It is written as a prelude to the next paragraph. A setup. A Pavlovian line that gets the dogs of monnbattery salivating. Because the juicy, meaty part is coming. Soon.

"There is a crisis in leadership..."

O
M
G

A crisis!!!111!!!!11!!!

Everybody PAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIC

"Maw, there's a crisis in leadership. Get the kids and Grandma in the cellar. Me and your brother are gonna get the rest of the cousins and move the still."

... and the country is fearful that some day terrorists might attack again.

Nope. Not a bit. I was just out for lunch in Hopkins on Friday. I did not see people cowering under parked cars. No buzz bombers. Nope. Saw none of that. Osama Bin Laden sits in a cave at night (or lays under a pile of rubble in a cave.) I drive to work. I have dinner with my family. I work to elect leaders of our community. I play pinochle on-line with people all around the country. I don't worry about Bin Laden. He doesn't pay me enough to worry about his sorry ass.

Heinzman continues with his complete lack of knowledge about how the country works:

This is a divided nation; it is not the 50 states united in attempting to
perfect a more perfect union. Rather this nation is battling one another in a verbal civil war — red states against blue states, conservatives against
liberals, Democrats against Republicans, Christians against non-Christians.

Perfect a more perfect union? That is just awful, I'm sorry.

No, Don. This is a country of 300 million people. Funny thing. For some reason we just don't agree on everything. Would you prefer armed civil war in the streets? That's how the Hamas run their affairs. Several African countries too. At least we don't imprison people for what they say (see: Egypt, China, Indonesia, Russia, et al.)

But he is right in one respect. There is a battle going on. Between the adults who realize that choices need to be made, and the moonbats who prefer to give compromise American values to appease those who would do us harm.

Osama Bin Laden must find it hard to believe that flying four airplanes into the twin towers, the Pentagon and a field in Pennsylvania could cause America to become so frightened and divided.

As a result Americans are willing to give up some of their liberties for the sake of their security, not realizing that paves the way to injustice and insecurity.

Huh? 3,000 innocent civilians die horrific deaths and you prattle on about supposedly an erosion of rights? Would you care to propose a solution? Leadership (the kind that you moaned about there being a crisis in) requires answers. Hugging a jihadist is not an acceptable answer. Solutions are needed. A plan, with strategic objectives, tactical capability to achieve the objectives, information about the enemy, the terrain, operational security constraints, and a host of other dimensions to prepare for tactical operations, logistical support to carry out the tactical manuevers! And commitment to carry it through.

As a service to the Mr. Heinzman and to the community as a whole, I will provide some inside information. Free of charge. Yes, you can get this information elsewhere. But they may charge for it. But being the magnaminous despot that I am, here it is:

In a war we don't tell the other side what we're gonna do. Hell, we don't even tell most of our side. See, if we published it in the papers then the terrorists might, you know, read it. And then they will know what we are going to do. Like in Vietnam when we would anchor a hospital ship off the shore 3 days before a major offensive was going to happen. We did that because the politicans made the military do that. The Viet Cong would see the ship and scatter. Or bring in reinforcements.

Here's another freebie: The nation has been divided since day one. Always has been, always will be. That is our foundation. Managed chaos. It is not orderly, nor is it always polite. But it works.

Fortunately we have learned. Iraq is not Vietnam. Though I am sure Zarqawi wishes it were.

More prattle from Heinzman:

Americans are facing one of the most important elections in its history, one that could change the watershed of domestic politics, policies and actions as a community, state and a nation.

Or not. "One of the most important elections in history" has become a trite expression. Another Pavlovian expression. This one sets up the fact that (are you ready for this?): Some people didn't vote last election! And if they would have then this country would be on the right course, angels would sing, and the world would once again be the harmonious, trouble-free place to live in the universe that it was before the Bush's moved into the neighborhood with their yappy dog and oil refineries. Here is Heinzman's steak for the drooling dogs:

In November, Minnesota voters will have the privilege of voting for a U.S.
Senator, eight Congressional seats, a governor, all members of the Minnesota House and Senate, county commissioners, school boards and local offices.

During the last general election, half of the people in this country
did not vote in a country that is supposed to be of the people, by the people and for the people, a country that, as written in the Declaration of
Independence, has governments instituted by men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.

In Minnesota, 3,658,000 of the registered voters voted in the last general election. While that is commendable, 815,078 registered voters did not vote in the general election in 2004.

Don't you see. Because people didn't vote we got the mess we got.

Or maybe this is the meat for the hounds:

When Americans are united, bound with a common purpose and led by men and woman of strength and character, they can move mountains and defeat terrorism, without giving up any of their freedoms.

Hmmmmmmmm. When Americans are bound with a common purpose? Sounds like slavery to me. A better metaphor might be in order here, particularly when you are thumping you chest about rights. And exactly which rights have we given up?

Do you have a plan to unite Americans in a common goal and purpose? (Plan: see above.)

I'm waiting....I have time. Lots of time.